Archive for December, 2007



« Older Entries

New Years 2007/2008

Monday, December 31st, 2007

Here I sit, broken hearted, tried to….

 

Well actually, I’m not by any means broken hearted and I havent tried to do anything yet, although I might go home a couple of hours and try to get horrendously drunk so I can bring in the new year on a high note.  But for now, here I sit, not broken hearted, but bored and starting to feel slightly insane as the only thing I’ve heard in the last 4 hours has been the drone of the server behind me and the bright downlights of the office are flickering in peripheral vision like stars in the sky.

 

Yes, its New Years Eve, and I’m in the office, and apart from the doorman upstairs I haven’t seen/heard anything all morning.  Looking up into the street outside seems to be the same story… Noones here, they’re all sleeping in, or commencing drinking to bring in the new year.  Or perhaps they’re playing Scrabble with a monkey, at least that’s what I should be doing.

 

But I made a decision this morning, and that was to get out of bed at 6:30AM to venture in to the city as I assumed everyone would be back after the christmas break.  If I hadn’t just paid £11.20 (yes, thats almost $30AUD) for a return ticket to get here and back, I probably would have gone straight home again.  But I did, so I won’t.

 

 

I thought I should take this oppurtunity to say Happy New Year all, as the people on the East Coast of Australia are merely minutes away from the moment, and those in Perth are not (surprisingly) far behind.

I’ve never been one for New Years Resolutions as I know I’ll break them, but due to recent changes in attitude toward a few things maybe I’ll give it a try this year.  So here goes:

  1. In the eternal quest for money, and much more of it, launch ShanCo (or similar, better name) and start working to produce side income
  2. Stop fart arsing around, believing that eating soup for lunch and walking to and from the train station is enough healthy food and exercise to become fit and lose weight, even though I work in a job all day that requires sitting, food and alcohol consumption (although I do occasionally use a computer too)
  3. Get these Christmas presents sent home, somehow Christmas presents in February doesn’t cut the mustard, it’ll have to do anyway though.
  4. Definitely don’t extend this contract as much as you want to, you have to get out and get some more experience elsewhere.
  5. Think about drinking less, then trick yourself by storing beer in Orange Juice bottles in the fridge
  6. Continue the proud Guiness Thursday tradition, but think of ways to improve on the concept
  7. Travel?

Tags: ,
Posted in Life, Other, UK, Work | View Comments

Memories – My First Car

Friday, December 28th, 2007

I saw something astounding on the side of the road the other day, something that stopped me dead in my tracks, and even if just for a second made my mouth drop straight open. Parked at the road’s edge just near work on St James Street, a Silver-Grey 1980′s Ford Granada, which while slightly smaller, bears a striking resemblance to my first car, the great cûn, my canary yellow XF Ford Falcon. Actually, it was more like a mix between an XD and an XE, but close enough to still bring a definite tear to my eye. Few moments have I experienced in the last 6 months or so where I was filled with both laughter, surprise and sadness such as this, and for that this momement will be long remembered.

The Granada

The Ford Granada, similar looking, but far less manly

Why all the fuss over a Falcon clone, one may ask? It’s a sh&^ty Australian family sedan (saloon for those UKey’d), that like the plethora of other large 1980′s vehicles (such as the Kingswood, Monaro, first Commodore’s, Torana and other period Falcons), is destined to rust bucketry and crushing (if this has not happened already). And its long been known for being a taxi, bus, and caravan for a certain Australian minority. But it was my car, and my first one at that, and it had so much history. After being used in an armed robbery and stolen at least 3 or 4 other times, it was responsible for many a fun evening of laid-back, non jaw-dropping fun and utter destruction (mostly of the car itself). Yes, the cûn was a star and shall go down in history as a legend, at least in my eyes.

The Ford XF Falcon

The cûn and I had an understanding, I could treat her like shit, stretch her to her absolute limits and she would never actually stop running on me, apart from the occasional limp. No, she didn’t break down on me constantly (apart from running out of fuel due to faulty fuel gauge), or blow a head gasket, its features just occasionally stopped working as they should or fall off altogether, like the airconditioner, radio, rearview mirror, wing mirror(s), pedals, windows, doors, backseats and other slightly more valuable organs. And there was always the odometer that stuck at 110191km over 5 years before she was rolled out of the driveway destined for the crushing yard. But it just kept on running, and I appreciate that.I’ve always said (about 5 years ago), that when I’m old and rich, I’ll go back and find the last surviving mint XF and buy it to put next to the Bugatti, and while I adamently believe this will never happen as all will probably have been scrapped its nice to keep living the dream.

Here’s an ode, to my first car
You learned and taught me, like a training bra
For you are and forever will be the wonderous cûn
Even though you could seldom muster a tune

You, me and the H man had some great times
Like limping home all broken diffed after dimes
And yes I know, I treated you like shit
But as most who remember know, you were a smashing hit

P.S: The author reserves the right to hide the original nickname for el cûn-o.

Tags: , ,
Posted in Life, Other, Travel | View Comments

Armin van Buuren – Top 20 Tracks of 2007 (ep 331)

Friday, December 21st, 2007

“Today is the day. Today is probably the most important day right after episode 300 Today, we have 20th of december, so it’s time for Top 20 tunes of 2007 The list is result of your own Top 5 as voted at arminvanbuuren.net – Armin Van Buuren himself or Armada Music do not have any influence on the results of this election. so the tracklist is in the reverse order from what they were played in.”

Tracklisting:

  1. John O’Callaghan feat. Audrey Gallagher – Big Sky (Agnelli & Nelson Remix) Armind Tune Of The Year
  2. Armin Van Buuren vs. Rank 1 feat. Kush – This World Is Watching Me (Cosmic Gate Remix) Armind
  3. Dash Berlin – Till The Sky Falls Down (Vocal Mix) Captivating
  4. Above & Beyond – Home (Club Mix) Anjunabeats
  5. The Blizzard – Kalopsia (Original Club Mix) Armind
  6. Armin Van Buuren – Rush Hour Armind
  7. First State feat. Anita Kelsey – Falling (Original Mix) Black Hole
  8. Vincent De Moor – Fly Away (Cosmic Gate Remix) Combined Forces
  9. Paul Van Dyk & Starkillers & Austin Leeds feat. Ashley Tomberlin – New York City Vandit
  10. Armin Van Buuren – The Sound Of Goodbye (Nic Chagall Drumbeat Re-Edit) Armind
  11. Filo & Peri feat. Eric Lumiere – Anthem (Original Vocal Mix) Vandit
  12. Above & Beyond pres. Tranquility Base – Oceanic (Original Mix) Anjunabeats
  13. Ilse DeLange – The Great Escape (Armin Van Buuren Remix) BMG
  14. Jonas Steur feat. Jennifer Rene – Fall To Pieces Black Hole
  15. DJ Shah feat. Adrina Thorpe – Who Will Find Me (Original Summer Sunrise Mix) A State Of Trance
  16. Albert Vorne – Formentera What (Gareth Emery Remix) Club Elite
  17. Cerf, Mitiska & Jaren – Light The Skies (Retrobyte Classic Electrobounce Mix) Baroque/Armind
  18. Breakfast – The Sunlight (Original Mix) Flashover
  19. Cosmic Gate feat. Denise Rivera – Body Of Conflict (Vocal Mix) Black Hole/Maelstrom
  20. Above & Beyond feat. Zoe Johnston – Good For Me (Thomas Datt Bootleg Mix) Anjunabeats

It’s released, the results of everyones votes are in!

Why the hell can’t I afford to go and see him? He’s playing tonight!

Tags: , ,
Posted in Music, Other, UK | View Comments

Damn you Initech!

Thursday, December 20th, 2007

Just a small rant today (nothing new), I’ve been top shelved today by certain management types in Marketing. It was our go-live day for my project at work, and a few of the things that were working perfectly in my testing have subsequently broken when introduced in the live environment, which in itself is not the most uncommon occurance.

The thing that got me about the whole process was that due to a couple of unforseen errors with our payment merchant (who handles all the incoming money from client credit cards), we had to remove a few of our protections to make sure we could still release before Christmas. The worst thing is, we’re now not covered by illegal/fraudulent credit card use, even though that was the one goal since the start of the project.

Thankyou Initech, with your wonderful customer service and documentation.

* Initech is the company from the move Office Space, but the sentiment still stays.

Tags:
Posted in Life, UK, Work | View Comments

Guiness Thursday update

Thursday, December 20th, 2007

Hi all, just thought I’d report in to say that since its inception the proud tradition of Guiness Thursday is going strong. Every week has seen at least 3 of us from work at lunchtime down the at pub, consuming at least a couple of pints.  It’s only been 5 weeks, but I can see this growing into a bustling little social club, as well as a healthy way to start the afternoon and a great way of life.

Who would believe?

Who would believe that these great minds could accomplish so much?

GT is, however, different that your normal whip-lash shoe-horn religion, there’s no rules, no commandments, and the only messiah is a black coloured liquid from Ireland.  Whilst there are no leaders, the word needs to be spread, for this is the job of the Guiness Thursday Spokesmen.  But, not wanting to sound cheesy, there’s a bit of GT spokesman in all of us.  So spread the word, join the force.On a side note, my boss, being the competitive type that he is, suggested a sort of Sporting Gala, a Guiness Olympics if you will.  It consists (but is in no way limited to):

  • The Sprint (skol, scull or down) – The Speed Event:-
  • First person to the bottom of a full ping of guiness is declared the winner
  • Default can be given if the winner has lost more than 20% of said pint on shirt/floor
  • Care should be taken to spot a cheat, though unfortunately (I’m not so lucky) the straight neck open throat pour is allowable, spillage rules still apply
  • The Marathon – An Endurance Event:-
    • Speed is not an issue here, its all about slow and steady
    • Pick a time period, and count pints until the end of the event/evening
    • Most drinks under the belt wins
    • In the interest of competitors safety the GOC (Guiness Olympic Committee) takes no responsibility for injuries occuring after the 15th pint
  • The Triathlon/…/Decathlon – The Skill Event:-
    • This event can consist of any number of stages, but usually comprises of both a sprint, a marathon, and the special event
    • The special event can be anything (in keeping with the Guiness tradition, an Irish Whiskey is preferred here)

I shall post results of the olympics, and we’ll see how the Aussies stand up against our English and North American counterparts, I expect it to be a whitewash.

 An event

A possible event? I think so

Tags: , , , ,
Posted in Life, Other, UK | View Comments

When the contractor became the ‘contract-er’

Monday, December 17th, 2007

I’m used to copping a fair amount of flack as a contractor at work, as I’m the youngest in the office, and as a result of this get paid far too much for doing far too little, in my bosses mind anyway. In fact, his exact words are (on a daily basis), “…, but you’re just a lowly contractor”. It’s funny though, like an extension of the Pom/Aussie tradition of ripping the shit out of each other for, well pretty much anything, it adds another layer to the whole office rivalry thing.

Now, being the lowly contractor that I am, I don’t expect much, I don’t get holidays, I don’t get sick pay, I don’t get a christmas bonus and I don’t have the same job security an full timer may have come to expect. This is a good and a bad thing, bad for the obvious reasons, good for the fact I have pretty much no responsibility and get paid more (apparently). The last thing I expected to be doing was giving and sitting in on job interviews. Yes, this contractor come contract-er is going to have a fun week.

I guess its good experience, and I should hardly complain, but it seems weird none the less. Least I’m not like the PHP guys, having to give interviews for over 50 people, I’ve only got to do two.


This may have helped

This got me thinking back to a job interview I had a while ago back home at a mining/oil company in Nedlands, Perth. The interview was going great, and I was clearly fit for the job, and I was asked:

Them: “What’s a word you would use to describe a good thing about yourself?”
Me: “Thorough, I need to make sure the job is done” (or something to that effect)
Them: “Now, whats a word you would use to describe a bad thing about yourself?”

Ah, the age old “bad” thing question, always going to catch the unprepared out. Like the scene with the bad thing from Peep Show, Jeremy couldn’t remember what the bad thing was, unlike Peep Show, my bad thing did not involve a blow job. But I was stuck…

Me: “Well, I can be lazy”

(deafening silence, with an odd look on smug interviewer’s face)…

I bet they’re still laughing at my expense. “Remember that lazy guy? That was the best interview I’ve done so far”. Well keep laughing, I would.

Had I have the above book, maybe I would have been able to answer the question. Maybe I would have said, I just try too damn hard, or work is an obsession, but thats not me. Lazy is. I love honesty.

- the HR/IT guy.

Tags: , ,
Posted in Life, Other, UK, Work | View Comments

Huge Night (Friday the 13th + 1)

Monday, December 17th, 2007

Not often do I regret my actions enough that I think about it for longer than about five minutes, but when you’ve got 3 and a half hours sitting on benches, buses, tube stations, tube trains, normal trains, normal train stations all in about zero degree (celsius) temperature, it gives you some time to rethink the course of an evening.

Yes, what was supposed to be two drinks at the pub after work turned into an almost 15 hour journey of excessive drinking, expensive champagne, way too much public transport and pointless wandering and an insight into the horrible seedy underside of London. Well all except the seedy underside part, the only thing that was seedy (Yes, the slang word seedy is when you feel like s*&t from consumption, not a disgusting pervert) was me and the other revellers stupid enough to be out.

Course of evening:

4:00pm: Head to Henry’s Bar in Mayfair for quick farewell drinks for work peeps who can’t make it to Christmas party on Monday
4:30pm: Start training for the first leg of the Guiness Olympics (more to come at a later date)
5:00pm: Head to Samuel Peppy’s (The birth place of the Guiness Thursday tradition and various TMD evenings).
5:30pm+: Empty SP’s of remaining Havana Club Rum and Glen Fiddich Scotch
…
11:30pm: Head to unknown club

I’ll stop here, as it started to become hazy after this point, but there were several more drinks including two glasses from two bottles of £200 champage (that I thankfully took no part in purchasing) and some white Sambuca shots (ech). At this time I came to the realisation (a mistake) that it was one oclock and and there was no way I was getting home without shelling out a substantial amount (£60-75+) for a black cab home, which I definitely wasn’t prepared to do. So I went with the flow, until the club (like the Ambar in Perth) closed at 3:00am.

From here we’d run out of options, and wandered around aimlessly in the code before getting on a bus, that interestingly enough went absolutely nowhere, and we ended up not far from where we started. So after a bit more fart-assing around and an interesting trip to King’s Cross and a huge waste of time at McDonalds, I’d had enough and decided to call it a night and head home. By this point (4:30am), I was completely over the evening, and after already yearning for my bed for well over 2 hours, I looked forward to making my way home, as quick as possible. And then the fun (and my stupidity started):

4:30-5:00am: Wait for bus at King’s Cross, after missing the last night bus.
5:08am: Catch first bus headed toward town, not quite in the right direction though.
5:30am: Get off on Oxford Street, just near where the club was
5:45am: Walking away from Bond St Tube Station after deciding it wasn’t the station I wanted walk around aimlessly looking for Marble Arch
5:55am: Find Marble Arch station, only to realise I needed to go through Bond St to get home anyway, wait for tube to Bond St
6:05am: Change trains at Bond Street Station and wait 20 mins for train to Waterloo Station
6:25am: Arrive at Waterloo station, wait on Bench for first train to Twickenham
6:45am: Happy that first train is an express train and I’ll be home in no time at all
7:05am: Finally, at Richmond station one stop away from Twicks
7:15am: Wake up before arriving at Staines station (shit!!)
7:35am: Get on first train going back home
8:30am: Finally showered and in bed asleep.


Dirty Seedy Underworld



So, it was a bit of an adventure, and 4 hours to sober up and wish I was at home in bed was enough for me, I’m too old for this!  That’s the biggest cop-out for a 24 year old ever I know, but next time Cath definitely has to be there, and there has to be an exit strategy, or at least a good way to get home.


And how the hell did I manage to last without sleep until falling asleep on the train?

		    		


		    		
Tags: , , 
 Posted in Music, Other, UK |   View Comments


		    	


		    		    

		    		
An update on the work and extra income situation

		    		Wednesday, December 12th, 2007

		    		

		    			
Things appear to be going well so far, slowly, but in a solid direction.  Since speaking the last time, I’m just starting two freelance lots of work, boosting up my personal work and starting on a joint venture with a mate from back home.  One of the freelance jobs is making simple front end changes on a photography webiste for approximately 10-30 hours, and the other is an going data access/manipulation wrapper for an accounting application but should be a nice chunk of cash in a couple of months or so.


Adventure


The venture with Rusty is for a project/website or group of sites comprising of tech related goodness.  I can’t say much now as its still most definately in its infancy, but if all goes to plan could quite possibly be a good startup, as I’m 90% sure it hasn’t been done quite the way we want to do it before.  It all comes back to that old notion that if you can’t think of something to do, take a previous idea, build on its weaknesses and make it better, much better.  And that’s the plan.   It should be great to have a partner for once, as this should provide motivation to get more and more done and slowly but gradually fill it with content.


I’m sure (hoping) everything will click into place, and in a year from now I can look back and see what kind of changes have been made, its not even necessarily about the money, just the name and satisfaction from doing something properly.


So the first part of the Out with the Old  initiative is well on its way, not that I’ve actually accomplished anything yet, but the groundwork has been laid and between Beer, Red Wine and Irish Coffee its about all I can think about.

		    		


		    		
Tags: , 
 Posted in .NET, Development, Work |   View Comments


		    	


		    		    

		    		
Two Girls, One Cup – A fan’s critique

		    		Monday, December 10th, 2007

		    		

		    			
Not since Weebl.com’s Badger, Badger, Lions and Tigers (only in Kenya) or the excellent dub of All your Base are Belong to us have I seen an internet phenomenon sweep as far, or as wide so quickly as Two Girls, One Cup (2Girls1Cup).  Unfortunately for reasons beyond my control, I’m unable to link to the actual spectacle as it goes against the extremely high mora standard that HD911 has tried to stick to since its inception, however a quick google search will yeild results in seconds.  I must say, it is most definitely NSFW (Not Safe for Work), and NSFSC (Not safe for Stomach Contents), nor is it in anyway cool, but its worth seeing none the less.. Neither I, nor the other managers (and there are hundreds of them) here at HD911 endorse or take any responsibilty by damage (mostly vomit) caused during the watching of this fantastic clip.


But this isn’t my point, the video in question is old news, it came, shocked and left endless destruction, similar to the Asian Tsunamis of December 2005.  Well sort of anyway, but I know better to suggest on a world scale they’re anywhere near as important for that would be a sensationilst, unfathomed and utterly false statement, but it was great none the less.


This school report (faked or not, I don’t know) came to my attention recently, and even days after reading it for the first time I’m still in fits of laughter.  It’s not gross or disturbing in anyway, just a critical review (in a true film review style).  I challenge everyone to read it, and if you don’t find it as funny as I did, then I owe you a Mars Bar or something.  I’ve linked straight from Halogrid forums for these partly because they also provide a great insight into this wonderous beast, and mostly because I’m just plain lazy.




news_funnyessaycx9.jpg




11943193181964fba946ak1.jpg


Update: I’ll host them myself, damn forums.

		    		


		    		
Tags: 
 Posted in Online, Other |   View Comments


		    	


		    		    

		    		
Thankyou Google

		    		Sunday, December 9th, 2007

		    		

		    			
It seems a few of my images (probably originally someone else’s) have been indexed on images.google.com, mysteriously within the last week or so I’ve started getting over 170 hits a day to a few posts effectively doubling my entire view history in the space of a week.  I was considering having a 2,000 hits party, but we might have to make that 4,000 now! 




Kudos to you google.




viewcount.gif



		    		


		    		
Tags: , , 
 Posted in UK |   View Comments


		    	


		    	

		    

		    	
« Older Entries